Talking Toilet Paper Dispenser

Somewhere at M.I.T. or IBM, an army of brilliant scientists dedicated their lives to inventing the microchip that powers the Talking Toilet Paper Dispenser. Oh sure, the microchips have also been used in things like computers and space shuttles. But we're certain it's the Talking TP Dispenser that makes them swell with pride. The Talking Toilet Paper Dispenser is amazing -- It allows you to record your own personal message that will be played every time someone pulls some paper off the roll. Your message can be rude, funny, musical, or -- if you're really twisted -- romantic. You get 6 seconds of recording time, which is enough time to surprise anyone. It's so funny they'll drop their pants. (Which, now that we think of it, should already dropped.) The Talking Toilet Paper Dispenser operates on 2 AAA batteries and fits most toilet paper holders. The microphone is built right in, so you can record your message over and over again. So on behalf of the Novelty Industry, we salute the scientists who brought us this amazing device. Keep up the good work, and be assured that your schooling and dedication is being put to good use! "