Docket #23VB55-W99622b
The State of New York
vs Stupid.com
OFFICIAL TRANSCRIPT
ATTORNEY: Can you state your name and title for the court, please.
MR. STUPID: Gary Apple. I'm the President --- Not of the United States.Just Stupid.com.
ATTORNEY: And you also go under the name... Mr. Stupid?
MR. STUPID: Uh, huh.
ATTORNEY: So tell the court... Mr. Stupid... Just when did you begin selling Instant Irish Accent Mouth Spray?
MR. STUPID: In February of 2005.
ATTORNEY: Were you aware at the time that the product did not actually work?
MR. STUPID: It didn't?
ATTORNEY: You mean you didn't even TRY a product you're selling?
MR. STUPID: Someone sells Electric Chairs. Do you think they try them?
ATTORNEY: Judge, please note that Mr. Stupid is a hostile witness.
MR. STUPID: Say that again and I'll kill you!
ATTORNEY: Since you didn't try the Instant Irish Accent spray, what made you think it would work?
MR. STUPID: It says so on the label.
ATTORNEY: Do you believe everything you read?
MR. STUPID: Not everything. For instance, I read your resume.
ATTORNEY: Perhaps you'd like to try some of your Irish Accent spray to see the kind of misleading products you sell.
MR. STUPID: Okay, I'll try it... Mmmmm, it's very tasty.
ATTORNEY: Taste is not the issue here. You claim that...
MR. STUPID: Faith and Begorrah! May the shamrocks always shine on your shaleleigh!
ATTORNEY: Judge, I object! The defendant is clearly faking it! |
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