SHAKESPEARIAN
INSULT GUM

Listen closely, you lumpish, idle-headed maggot-pie. Thou art a villainous toad if this stupid candy does not make you laugh.

Shakespearian Insult Gum looks like a miniature collection of Shakespearian masterpieces. But each 1-inch tall box contains two fruit-flavored gum balls along with a pithy Shakesperian insult. 

You get 7 little volumes in a miniature bookshelf (making it 14 gumballs and 7 insults). If you're wondering why someone would make such a product, join the club.

And if you don't purchase it, you are nothing but a rank, rump-fed wagtail!