SIGMUND FREUD
HEAD POPS

Lollipops for your oral fixation. 

Vienna, 1927

PATIENT: Dr. Freud, I had the strangest dream.

FREUD: Ya, ya... so tell me this dream of yours.

PATIENT: I dreamed I.... I'm embarrassed to say it, doctor.

FREUD: Embarrassment is just your mind's way of telling you to wash the dishes of your ego.

PATIENT: Uh, if you say so.

FREUD: So what was this dream?

PATIENT: I dreamed that... that I was sucking on your head, doctor!

(Sigmund tries not to look surprised, but his cigar falls out of his mouth and lands in a goldfish bowl.)

FREUD: Uh, well... ya, this is a common dream. My head, you say?

PATIENT: Not really your head. It was a lollipop. But it looked just like you.

FREUD: I see. And this lollipop that looked like me...

PATIENT: Just your head.

FREUD: Just my head... Was it any particular flavor? Banana perhaps?

PATIENT: It was watermelon flavored. And delicious! But every time I licked your 2-1/4 inch sugary head, I felt guilty. What does the dream mean, Doctor Freud?

FREUD: Ahhhh, it is easy to interpret! My candy head represents your desire to enjoy this period of self discovery. The watermelon flavor.... because it is the biggest fruit... means that you are insatiable in your appetites.

PATIENT: And the four inch stick, doctor? What does that mean?

FREUD: I'm sorry, we have to stop.