Mustaches, give 'em a twirl for only
  $4.99 for all seven!

Double O Stupid

Just another busy day for a master spy.  But then, the unthinkable!  Despite your carefully laid plans  you've been spotted!  You're surrounded!   Escape is impossible!  Or. . . is it?  Quickly now, you pull out your Self-Adhesive Mustache Disguise Kit.  There is a momentary pause as you consider the various styles available to you.  Should you go with the brutish appeal of "The Bruiser" or the homespun charm of "The Square"?   But then you realize that if you don't act quickly, they will get the microdot hidden under your left big toenail!  

It is done!   You watch your enemies look around in befuddlement as you saunter casually by.  Another successful evasion and your smirk is framed by the gray flaring wings of  "The Grandpa Mustache."  Wise choice!

 The Mustache Disguise Kit is also good for aspiring barbershop quartet singers, and just about everybody with an upper lip. They're self-adhesive, so no glue is necessary. As you can see on the left, the kit is  very handsomely packaged, so you can just hang it on your wall until you need to change your appearance.