Each Holiday season, countless people take the easy way out and buy artificial Christmas trees. (They're probably the same folks who give you a fruitcake every year.) Others try to be more traditional and purchase real pine trees. Their hearts are in the right place, but someone else did all the work. It's like hiring someone else to unwrap your presents or kiss your wife under the mistletoe. 

No, there's only one true way to immerse yourself in the holiday spirit...
Grow Your Own
Christmas Tree!

And this handy kit contains everything you need to achieve that goal. Look at all you get inside the package!
 
A) an actual pine cone
B) an 8 -page instruction manual
C) Uh, actually, that's about it

The guidebook will take you step-by-step through the Christmas Tree growing process. You'll learn that hoses are a good source of water and how gophers are the Christmas Tree's natural enemy.

You even get cut-out tree ornaments to decorate your finished  tree.

Sure, it may take 10 or 20 years to get your Christmas Tree ready, but think of the satisfaction that you (or your heirs) will feel chopping it down and putting gifts under it!

GROW YOUR OWN
CHRISTMAS TREE
Just $2.99!