John McCain Mask

When John McCain was shot down over Vietnam and locked up in the Hanoi Hilton, we know what kept him going. Sure, they were starving him and torturing him, but he kept telling himself, "Hang in there, Jonnie boy. One day you'll be out of here, and a website called Stupid.com will be selling a mask that looks just like you. You gotta survive just so you can see that."

Well, that time has come. We're proud to offer this incredible latex mask that bears an excellent resemblance to the Republican Presidential Nominee. Just slip on the mask, and you're ready to hop on the Straight Talk Express!